The story outline: An association of environmental activists, calling themselves THOC (”The Heat Of Change”), invites the leaders of the G7 countries (with Russia left out!) to a conference where they should discuss the global warming issue. Once those seven gentlemen get there, THOC pump sleeping gas into the conference room, kidnap all seven of them and put them on a steadily melting ice floe in the arctic, equipped with nothing but some bags of salt that came with their last meal, to battle it out – because they are all held responsible for this very melting ice floe that could now be the end of them! The one to survive this battle to the freeze will then be in charge of the fight against global warming, assuming he has learned his lesson.

Definitely pioneering work in the field of constructivist eco-propaganda games, and at the same time a hot-seat battle for up to seven leaders of the world!

If Salvador Dalí would have been executive producer of a Beat ‘em Up, this is what it would have looked like. The level design often contains human body parts. Level bosses have (with some exceptions) exaggerated genitalia and use them to attack you mercilessly. On your way through the levels you fight giant floating heads, controlled by miniaturized people. There are enemies with huge surreal animations and contraptions to fight you, but there are some who just don’t have any animation at all, but rather glide through the level awkwardly without moving their feet.

The greater purpose of our fighting gourmets remains unclear, but as usual, it involves a mad scientist with a fancy hat, some vials, some green liquid, cloning and generally evil biomechanic experimental menace. This has to stop, no doubt!

So, what’s with the power up and the health, crucial elements of every decent fighting game? Is it pizza, or burgers? No, because this is the Gourment Squadron on the way to, well, on the way to victory. Some of your opponents carry ingredients such as garlic, soybeans, lobster, seafood or tofu, and after you have given them the pounding they obviously deserved, you can collect them. But! To draw maximum health and power from those ingredients, you also have to combine them in a proper way after each level by feeding them into your robo chef. If you haven’t spoiled it, you’ll have a healthy seafood salad, regain your strength, and then on to the next level of sexually charged ass kicking and mushroom foray!